I don’t often get to listen to music on the radio: we do a lot of Odyssey, Thousand Foot Krutch, Skillet and whatever the kids are jamming to. But today, in between switching cd’s, that song from Steven Curtis Chapman came on, and I left it ON, like the rebel I am. I don’t know if you’ve heard it. “Do Everything?” It’s great. Bouncy music, words we can all identify with. Sometimes, a little too much. Like today.
“You’re picking up toys on the living room floor for the fifteenth time today
Matching up socks
Sweeping up lost cheerios that got away
You put a baby on your hip
Color on your lips and head out the door
While I may not know you,
I bet I know you
Wonder sometimes, does it matter at all?”
What IS THE POINT? Why does it all have to be so mundane? Clean up the same stuff, over and over. Change a diaper. Dress in clothes, change to pajamas, change to clothes. Make meals. Hear complaints. Buy more groceries for food no one’s going to like, but it’s healthy, and that’s what I’m supposed to do. “Don’t touch! Speak with kindness. Show love! Finish this question. Time to clean up! Let’s not sit on the stove. Please don’t put that in your nose.”
Am I doing this right? What am I doing so wrong? I know the verse from Hebrews about running the race with perseverance (12:2). But how am I supposed to run when I have one kid on my ankle, and another holding onto my neck?
And I don’t think my struggle is different than anyone else. Sure, you may not have peanut butter in your hair, but we all get stuck in a funk where we are doing the same thing, day in, day out, and just don’t seem to get anywhere. Why get up in the morning? Why care? Why finish the assignment? Why smile at the complaining customer? Why care about something that won’t matter a week from now, let alone a year?
Well, the song continued.
“Well let me remind you, it all matters just as long
As you do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you,
Cause he made you,
Every little thing that you do
To bring a smile to His face
Tell the story of grace
With every move that you make
And every little thing you do.”
And I’m bawling. Great. The car is silent. This isn’t a big deal for normal people, but when there is four little ones in your car and you can hear a pin drop, that’s shocking. After all, they can’t get into anything. They’re strapped in. Nope, this is “Oh-great-Mom’s-lost-it-again-just-wait-don’t-move-hopefully-it-will-pass.”
I stop the car.
The Quick One gathers up courage. “Umm, Mom? Are you CRYING?”
“Are we late?”
“No.” (sob) And then it comes.
“YOU GUYS! I don’t have to do this ‘right!’ I don’t have to make sure everything is organized all the time! I don’t have to make sure everything you eat is exactly right. I just have to do it for Jesus! He knows who I am! He’s the one who made me! I can’t control our house. I can’t control you guys. I can just do my best, for Him, and He will be so happy! He loves me no matter what! (hiccup, blow nose) I MAKE HIM HAPPY!”
Luckily, our kids are raised in a charismatic church, because there was no awkward silence (you know, like “umm, duh? You’ve been telling us that for awhile?”)
Nope, the kids knew just what to do.
“YAYYY!!!” “Thank you, Jesus!!” “Hooray!”
And that’s it. This is running the race with perseverance: when you can’t see the whole picture.
JUST KEEP GOING.
We can’t always analyze over and over, am I in the right place? Am I doing it the right way? Sometimes you just have to stick with it, not knowing if you are wasting you’re time, or in the middle of God’s perfect timing.
Sometimes, you just have to keep running. Or walking. Or crawling.
Whatever you’re trying, wherever you are, whatever you do, do it to make Him smile. If He hasn’t called you to move, you’re in the right place.
For some, this may be fluff. For me, today, this is gold.